8 ways to give yourself love on care on Valentines Day


February is the month of love. Cliché as it might be, I think we need a month of love. People are generally in a better mood in February. Chocolates, flowers, gifts all around! Who wouldn’t be in a good mood. My husband and I have never celebrated valentines day, but it has given us a lot of perspective regarding our love life. It serves as a reminder that we need to love each other more and more each and every day, not just in February, not just on birthdays and definitely not just on anniversaries. Every day should be a day of love. Not just for lovers, but for families and friends.



I was with a friend at a function one day, bridal shower I think (not mine mind you). And she said, ‘Karabo, in marriage, never forget yourself! A lot of women get married and forget to take care of themselves. They become so busy taking care of their husbands at the beginning. Then the children come and they get added to the list but they forget to take care of themselves. Society has us thinking that we are doing a great job when we do that, but we do that to our own detriment. We would actually be better wives, better mothers if we took time out to take care of ourselves.’


I had never thought about it that way, but as she said that, it made sense. I would sacrifice my needs for my husband or my kids. Sometimes even when I do not have to do that. Occasionally I would buy myself something nice I liked, but I would also feel bad and not overly enjoy it.

That day I decided I would try harder to take better care of myself. I am still working on doing more self care and self love things, but I am a long way from where I was that day at the bridal shower. Self care and self love do not have to be about spending too much money and sometimes you can do that without spending any money. I have put together a list of 8 things you can do on a monthly basis to show yourself some love and care.


8 ways to give yourself some love and care


  1. Bubble bath

We have a drought currently in Cape Town so a bubble bath is something of a luxury and something that maybe our friends outside the province can enjoy. For the Cape Tonians, this will be something we can indulge in once the rains come and the dams over flow. A bubble bath made with scented oils, candles around the bath tub, bath salts, a refreshing drink and time to yourself will do you wonders.


  1. Buy/Pick flowers for yourself

Receiving flowers is great, but appreciating yourself enough to buy yourself flowers is even more amazing. Flowers brighten the room and fill it with love and beauty. Don’t wait for someone to buy you flowers on a special occasion. When you are feeling down and blue, go out and get yourself flowers for your room to lift your spirits up.




  1. Social Media Cleanse

Maybe I should have started with this one. The truth is, we spend way too much time on our phones, checking out who said what, who posted what picture, who is where doing what. This can get toxic real fast. Go social media free for at least a week every month and you will be amazed at how good you feel, both mentally and physically.


  1. Take yourself out on a date

I am sure there are a lot of places you have seen that you like and are always thinking of taking someone to. Go on your own. Don’t wait for someone to ask you there, take yourself there. You are your most important VIP, treat yourself as such. If it is at a dressy venue, dress up, look pretty and go have fun. It could be that coffee shop around the corner. It doesn’t matter where you go, as long as you go and have fun. Meet new people.


  1. Make a list of everything that you are thankful for

There is nothing like a good ol list to bring things into perspective. Write down a list of things or people that you are thankful for.


  1. Happy List

While we are on the list trip. Here’s another list to make. Make a list of everything that makes you happy and make sure you do at least one or two of those things regularly. Think of it as a personal bucket list.


  1. Have a cup of herbal tea

No, I don’t mean green tea. There are a lot of amazing herbal teas that are soothing, relaxing, smell and taste great. Go out and get yourself some tea and give yourself some love.


8. Sleep

I will admit, I do not always sleep as much as I should. There is always something that needs to be done. But I do occasionally sleep in. Not that I am tired, but because my body needs to rest. My mind is sharpest after an evening of amazing long sleep. Sometimes we need to rest and recharge in a literal way, through sleep.


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